What is your love language?

What is your love language?

My dominant one is being emotionally present and supportive.

For my family. 
For my friends.
For my clients and colleagues.

I want to know how someone really is, beyond the "all good" or "I'm fine". It's why I'm also fine with tears. I just want to help them - if I can, and if that is what they need.

If I'm not too caught up in my "own stuff" (so I can be externally present) then I can overtly feel people's emotional state. Regardless of what they say. So sometimes it doesn't start with a conversation. It can just be a smile. Or a hug.

It's a gift I want to give to others. Because I can, and I know they need it, and I value deep relationships. It's also why I love my work on Uncomfortable Growth® (which generally comes from what is hard, rather than easy) 

It's also a gift though that can be really draining, so I am mindful to take care of me too. 

I'm careful to balance emotional giving with internal refuelling. Which means investing in things which I enjoy and give me energy. Like writing and creating (I love exploring and birthing new ideas - with a cup of coffee and my dog and cat at my feet). I also love exercising in the morning (with an awesome group of women at the gym) and meditating - because that simple act of pausing for half an hour sheds so much of the noise and tension inside.

Our gifts are also our strengths, but they are still exhaustable. So its important to not only give, but also to accept and refuel. The better I am, the better I can be for others.

Below is an example of a love language (act of service) from my parents. I was facilitating a conference in Canberra, and stayed overnight at their place as it's enroute, and lovely to spend the night with them. When I woke up the next morning, my breakfast and "morning tea" cake for the car was neatly on a tray (thanks mum), with directions to put into the car GPS (thx Dad - even though I use Google Maps!)

It's so often the small, unexpected things, that make you feel seen, loved and energised to pay it forward. 

What love have you given or received today? How did it make you feel?